Sunday, January 24, 2010

The BLISS of My Ignorance

Well now... I'm currently on a Comfort & Joy kick and I've made a decision! It started last July, and I'm kicking it up a notch, effectively immediately! Mostly due to my far away brother pulling another surprise visit on us! He came, it seems, to support my local brother in his civil marriage ceremony to a girlfriend, the local family had no idea was happening. I decided months ago that I don't have a need to & nor do I want to know everything going on with everyone in our family. But when a sibling gets married (for the 3rd time) and he doesn't t tell you or invite you.. What are you supposed to feel?

My comfort and joy seems to fade off into the sunset when I'm drawn, sucked or dragged into other people's complicated *schtuff! (my polite word for s-h-i-t). This secret marriage certainly is complicated. And now I want my comfort and joy back!

Last summer, when a relative went on a rant about superfluous nonsense of her own doing... Out of curiosity, I asked "Why are you telling us this stuff?" And not speaking for any one else, I added "I don't particularly want to know about it." She was startled, "You don't?!! Well! You neeeed to know!" That was my queue to leave.

My new philosophy? I'll ask you no questions, and you don't tell me anything that isn't pleasant and peaceful and nice! I have learned that I am at my best with my family, when I abide in the
rest, peace, comfort and quiet of Apt 10b. I have enough going on in my own life as an enterprising single woman & mom, on this side of town, and I am not willing to commute for some family drama!

I love my brothers. But I don't get them. For now, my feelings are hurt. I didn't hear from either of them all day Friday or Saturday. I missed a call from one of 'em @ 6am today. No message. I'll get over it.

That's why I'm sooo looking forward to Byron Katie's workshop tonight! One of my favorite quotes of hers is:
"Everything happens FOR me, not to me." - I love this!

And with that said.. I have resorted to speaking to those mellow dramatic friends and family.. what the art piece above says so clearly...
"Talk to the hand 'cause the face ain't listening."

Art: "Joseph Campbell Said (2009)" by Valerie Alon


T said...

Did you see Byron Katie at Unity? I wanted to go to that!! What did you think?

Mom in Apt. 10b said...

Hey There! Yes I saw her @ Unity!

I didn't really jive w/that q & a format.. An hour in, a friend and I cut out for chit chat & wine @ LaMadeleine.

But it was fun to see her in person. I think "The Work" is so helpful it's ridiculous! And it's the coolest thing since "The Course." :)